When we say someone is negative, or has a negative vibe, or gives us negative energy, do we ever stop to consider what that “negative” really means? What’s the standard they’re supposedly falling short of? What’s the measure that makes their stance negative, their words pessimistic, or their presence draining to us?

Let me give an example. Say you decide to jump from a height of 10 meters. Someone tells you not to do it, that it will either kill you or seriously injure you. In that moment, that person feels negative to you. But that negativity is relative to your situation. You’re standing in a position that’s overly positive. The decision you’ve made is unrealistically optimistic, almost absurd, and it’s bound to fail. From your perspective, any more reasonable opinion sounds negative. But in truth, from a rational point of view, that person is being positive. They’re saying something in your favor. Not from your angle, but from the angle of reality, where a fall from more than one or two meters is bound to cause serious harm.

My point is this: when you, your project, your team, or the conditions you’re working in are set up to fail, it’s natural that I, or anyone who’s thinking about feasibility rather than the fun of the attempt, will speak very directly, and it might sound negative. Dost Acı Söyler, true friends tell bitter truths. Or put another way: let’s make sure we don’t surround ourselves with sugar-chasing flies.

Notes:
1. I dedicate this piece to all the “negative” people out there.
2. Judgment is bad. (Really?)
3. I’ll never change my position just to match someone else’s angle of view.