Daily Notes
Almost two years after arriving in Turkey, my main issue remains the lack of a work visa, which in turn prevents me from planning for the future and living peacefully with myself. Things like having calmness at home, enough space for activities beyond sleeping, and a place free from interruptions for cooking have all become my regrets.

My efforts to find an alternative job haven’t yielded any meaningful results so far. I’ve had a few interviews, most of which offered nothing beyond the current situation. A few clumsy lies are spun to exploit me as much as possible, and once they’re done, they toss me aside like a used tissue and continue with their lives. The promise I made to my mother to avoid revenge against my current company has been a barrier, otherwise, the Araz I know wouldn’t give up this easily.

Peace with the Office Cat
For a while now, one of the female cats in the building where my company is located gave birth at the entrance of the company on the top floor, producing three fairly cute kittens. The most distant spot from the entrance and the carpet laid on the top floor likely influenced this decision.

The problem was (or had been) that this lady apparently didn’t like my face, and each time I entered or exited the company, she would threaten me with a Voldemort-like hiss to stay away from her kittens. I had no intention nor interest in doing that. I just wanted to enter the company. Due to the increasing threats from the mother cat and her radical behavior earlier today, I strongly felt the urge to kick her head, but I restrained myself and decided to try a peaceful approach in the morning. I took a piece of kashar cheese from the company fridge and placed it in front of her. She eyed it suspiciously, ate it, took a few steps back, and I was able to leave the company (without violence) and go have lunch. When I returned, she stayed in the same corner and allowed me entry without any threat. Our peace is now stable.

A Project to Escape Depression
A few weeks ago, at the height of feeling stuck from repeated failures and the issues mentioned earlier in this post, a dear friend emailed me saying they wanted me to redesign their blog. I accepted immediately, knowing that at least to preserve my reputation, I couldn’t postpone it. It would definitely become a trigger to get the rusted cogs of my mental life turning. I was right, it pushed me into action and with a fairly positive mood, I continued the fight to improve my situation. Hopefully, [after two years] it will work out.

All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story
- Karen Blixen